You read right. I hate/d it when people would say things like that and then hey presto! be pregnant in a jiffy! I never got pregnant in a jiffy and to be quite honest I'm jealous of people who do. Still am, always will be. Especially those who don't 'try' for their second child and get pregnant again, really quickly. First time fertiles - I can somewhat handle. Second time fertiles - I cannot.
I don't think it's always been this way. I think after a year or so of trying for our first/second/third pregnancy I hated first time fertiles more. I think it's only now we are trying for our second (or not trying or trying not to try) that I care about people getting pregnant quickly with their second and subsequent children.
This whole trying not to try thing is so foreign to me now. I'm sure last time we did that for a decent amount of time, but I honestly can't remember TTC without the tears and the heartache at the end of each cycle. I'm trying my best to be a good little infertile and relax but I'm totally shit scared that it will take a long time again. I couldn't even cope and get myself out of bed in the mornings let alone looking after a baby aswell, I guess this time I'll have to be tougher about it. Who am I kidding? I'm a much more emotional person now that I'm a mummy than before. God help me, any anyone else who has to be around me during this time!
I'm trying to positive, really, I am. But TTC and positive just don't sit well for me.
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