And I apologise. Thank you to the people who have been checking up on me.
I'm ok.
There are a few reason why I haven't blogged recently.
1. Morning sickness which should be called all day sickness, and no one told me that having a spew wouldn't make you feel better. I thought it would be like being drunk, you have a vomit, you get up and you're ready to go again. Not so. Don't mistake this for complaining, because I love it, and I'd happily vomit every day for the rest of my life if it ensured that this little baby makes it into our world safe and sound.
Actually I'm struggling at the moment with people who do complain about morning sickness. I'm a part of an online forum and each month there are Mummy threads, so I am in the September 2009 Mummy Thread. I've longed to be in one of those threads for over two years, from before we started trying. And now I find myself faced with it, I'm finding it difficult. Hearing people whinge about the horrifically of morning sickness and some of the unpleasant things that happen during pregnancy really gets to me. I guess it's that infertile, miscarriage survivor part of me it just hurts seeing people complain about something so, unimportant. There are so many worse things than being sick because you are pregnant. I want people to embrace the sickness, the giant boobs, the copious amounts of CM just like I do. As a blessing as something amazing that only the luckiest of woman get to experience.
2. This is an infertility blog, and I don't know how I feel about writing about pregnancy to an infertile audience and I don't know how you guys feel about reading about some one lucky enough to have lived and survived it. I'd appriciate feedback on this.
3. I'm scared. I'm scared if I write about it, I will jinx it. I was in discussion about 'Normal Pregnancy' today, about how infertility and loss makes successful pregnancy, the ones with baby at the end, something that happens to other people. I hate to admit this and I only did for the first time today, but........ As much as I am so over joyed about being pregnant, as much as I love day dreaming about the day our baby will be born, how our nursery will look, what our baby will be and what we will call him or her. I have no emotional attachment yet. I'm too scared. The first two times the emotional attachment I felt for our babies almost destroyed me when we lost them. It's not a conscious decicion I've made to feel like that, but just something that is. Something that I hope changes over time with this pregnancy.
4. There is not a great deal to say at the moment! Most of the time, I'm a bundle of nerves about what will happen when we go for our next scan in 3 and a half weeks time.
So now a word on the Pregnancy
Today I'm 9w4d, still spewing at least once a day, and generally feeling sick at other times. Other than that, there is not a great deal to say! We told our parents and somehow it seems the entire universe knows, which is really quite disappointing, I was hoping to tell people after our scan at 13 weeks.
Anyway for now, that is all.
12 comments:
Congratulations on your pregnancy. I wish you all the best. I know your scared and it's ok to be scared. I've been reading your blog for a while, but this is the first time I've been able to comment. Keeping you and your little one in my thoughts and prayers.
Great to hear that you are doing fine :) I was actually a bit worried because you didn't post for a long time. I'd love to hear about your pregnancy and baby, so if you ask me keep posting!
Wow! Glad to see a post from you! :-) I'm thrilled to hear you're having continued morning sickness!!! ...and this is your blog, you can write whatever you want in my opinion. I'm just glad you're ok--and hope everything keeps going ok! Look forward to hearing about that scan in a few weeks too.
(((Hugs)))
Glad you are sick, means it's going well!
I know EXACTLY what you are saying! Having survived 2 m/cs myself- I feel the same about being pregnant! I dont take any of this ALL day sickness for granted- yet I am scared to death as well! I hope this ends for us soon!
Really glad to hear you are doing well. Had been wondering when you were going to give us an update on how you were doing. Glad you are well!
As for writing about pregnancy...I would say that's up to you. It's your blog and if people dont want to read it because of that, then that's okay. I dont know, like I said, it's up to you. Im still facing the IF, but Im alright with you keeping us posted on how you are doing. Im sure deep down, everyone would like to know :)
So...keep us updated! Hope the morning sickness gets better soon :)
(((Hugs)))
Yay for the update! I was getting worried.
I'm glad everything is going so well. I'd love to have morning sickness myself and experience everything that you're experiencing too!
I'd love to read about your progress, so don't mind that you're posting preggy stuff on a IF blog. This is your blog after all, and you're pregnant, so please feel free!
Oh please keep blogging women who are pregnant bring me and other IF'ers so muc hope to see ourselves there one day! YOu were just like us and now you are just where we want to be so it will be wonderful to read your updates!
Praying for you and to help your morning sickness!
I'm so relieved to see you back here. Believe it or not, people a half a world away really are concerned about you and wondering how you're doing. :) I'm thrilled that everything is still going well.
I would also tell you that you should go ahead and keep blogging. This blog is much more about your life than your infertility. Your infertility was the big thing going on in your life for a while, but now PREGNANCY is the big thing going on in your life!! When I was pregnant the last time, I know that some people stopped reading my blog because they couldn't handle it. That's okay. Ladies in the IF world are pretty good at self-preservation and they'll do what they need to do. Some people will want to keep up with your story, so if you ask me, blog away!!
Glad to hear you are doing well (except for the morning sickness part)
Like some of the others said, I hope you keep on blogging. I believe it does give hope to some of the gals still struggling with IF. I can relate to how you feel about blogging after IF. I think that IF follows us around for a very long time and affects other aspects of our lives even after a successful PG.
Good luck and take care. Hope the morning sickness calms down a bit. (Infertility sucks it makes you actually feel like Morning sickness is ok and we shouldn't complain about it! Complain away my dear you have earned it! :) )
I'd cringe (and still do) whenever I hear somebody complaining about how fat they've become or how they hate being pregnant..blah blah blah blah blah... I've gotten numb to them and now I give my Oscar award nomination act whenever they complain to me.
Everything sounds good! I know I'm weird but I loved vomitting. It's just an indication that things are going ok. Once you hit your 2nd trimester, the puking stops and your energy returns. I remember hitting my 20th week that I started to get excited! So, here's my Gospel according to Puke, may you puke and have a healthy bub.
BIG HUGS. & will be praying for a beautiful scan in 3 and a half weeks time.
ps. Bring tissues with you when you go for your scan. I was a bawling mess! :)
hey - you ok? I heard you left Maternal?!!? ps update me!
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